I’ve been defeated. I’ve been brought to my knees. I feel weak. Just as I thought I had it all figured out. Just as I thought I had all the puzzle pieces in place. Swoosh. The rug is once again pulled out from under my feet. I know. It’s happened many times before. But I forget. I always forget. Hmm. Convenient. Every time it happens, feels like the very first time. But then I remember. And it only makes it worse.
You have shed blood for that person. You’ve given them all you’ve got. You’re filled with expectation. And then they let you down big-time. Again and again. Yep. You know the feeling.
I feel burdened. I feel heavy. It’s that familiar pain. It sits on my chest. It’s at it again. Like a heavy cloak, it weighs me down. Head to toe.
I feel disgusted. I wish I could just drop dead. I wish I could just sleep forever and not dream, not even for one split of a lifetime. I’m a loser. I’m a victim. I’ve been defeated. I’ve been brought to me knees. And I don’t know if I’ll ever get up.
Deception. It will do that to you…
This is a very emotional post. I can relate to it.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your comment, CT. Just grateful I had enough awareness to let the emotion out of my system when it came up!
ReplyDeleteRon all I can say is WOW (that was good). Augie
ReplyDeleteThank you Augie for your very kind words. Will try to keep it up on the next one!
ReplyDeleteWow, what an amazing post. So heartfelt and something we can all relate to - thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteStacy Green (blogger will NOT let me use my Wordpress link, grr!)
Yes. We really are all one, aren't we? Thank you for your very kind words, Stacy!
ReplyDelete