Psychology can be loosely understood as the study of how thoughts interfere in people’s behavior. So here’s a bit of psychology for you:
The thoughts that cause people most problems are those related with survival and safety. In fact, we will attach ourselves to even the most negative thoughts if we believe they are needed for survival.
Of these “primal” thoughts, the ones concerning dependence on approval or love are the toughest to deal with. These thoughts are related with survival because during our early childhood (when thought patterns are formed) we believed that our survival depended on approval—or at least permission—from others.
The key to solving these problems is to understand that we are our own source of love and acceptance. It is impossible to love someone more than we love ourselves; it is impossible to receive more love from someone than the love we are willing to give to ourselves.
Our world is populated with projected, automated patterns. We need to learn to see them from the outside, from a detached perspective. We need to retrieve our projections. We need to know that what we think we are results from personal interpretation.